Often people go around being weighed down by the opinions of others. Whether they admit it or not they want the appraisal of certain people in their lives.
Some other people find their value from being liked by others and if they are not careful the obsession with being liked may lead them finding themselves doing every and anything they can, including lying and trampling down on others to create a lovely perception of themselves and to be loved by all.
So it would seem like they are indirectly saying: I need to make people like me at whatever cost.
People are very important. We need each other and you may find that individuals who are part of a healthy community do better than people who are loners. How do you become part of a healthy community though? How do you get people to like you while being genuine? Do you do any and everything to win the affection of everyone?
If you pretend to be a person you are not, you loose your own identity. One day you look back and realize that you don’t even recognize yourself. You can get lost in your own web of pretense. I think it’s okay to learn the ways of a people but it’s fraudulent to pretend to be who you are not. You may also eventually hurt the people you claim to love when your sole goal is getting liked regardless of the journey to getting there.
No relationship can solidly be built on the foundation of lies, eventually the building comes crumbling down and you hurt yourself, the people you claim you love and the relationship. So while it may look like you are winning in the short term, in the long term it may not be so.
Another downside to seeking the love of every Tom, dick and harry by legal and illegal means is that you eventually hurt the relationships between your family and friends. Beef may decide to tell chicken whatever he wants to hear and do the same with fish. Beef however being the middle man in this scenario refuses to tell the real truth to either chicken or fish in a bid to save face and keep ‘peace’. Even though everything under the sun eventually gets revealed, in the interim, fish and chicken may be at odds because of beef. Don’t be beef.
Am I against being liked by people? Oh no, far from it. We need people. We need each other. We should however have healthy self esteem and seek to build genuine relationships with people that does not see us trampling down others. It may be helpful to identify your core, your truth and your purpose and let this guide you in the everyday dealings and relationships of your life.
While there may be a place for diplomacy, let it not be confused with lies. Eventually people see through and are able to tell what person’s are genuine and those who always twist the truth.
As you set out this week, I hope you build meaningful relationships but do it on healthy and truthful grounds, for while we need people, we can only sustain genuine relationships in the long run. Relationships built on lies can result in resentment and anger. If you are already dealing with resentment read this to gain some perspective.
Make some friends this week and rekindle healthy old friendships but do them all on the right foundation.
Healthy self esteem
Genuine desire to help others
Thank you for reading my post. Please like, subscribe and share.
Do you care about the opinions or others? At what cost do you go to keep yourself in the good books of the people around you?
Any advise about how to win healthy liking from the people around you?
Quintessential Faith 😊🌹